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[Brad Blackman]

In the blog, I brought up how I tend to take things too personally, since I never learned how to separate myself from the situation. So I ask you, "how do you go about creating distance between your emotions and what goes on around you? How do you get yourself out of the way?"

[Patrick Rhone]

he thing I always try to remember is that other people can not and do not control your emotions, you do.

In other words, you could say what another person says or does "makes me feel bad" but that is not the truth of what is really going on. The truth is, you are choosing (and it is, in fact, a choice) to react a particular way to that external action. Although it is often not easy, we can choose to react a different way.  I have written about this before on my blog in the post titled "The Problem May Be You"

I am as susceptible to misplaced responsibility for my emotions as the next guy. That said, trying to remember that I can choose to feel differently sometimes helps.

[Stephen Smith]

I worked in hospitality (restaurants and hotels) for a long time and I learned to tell myself that I would likely not see this rude person again, so don't let them get to me.

Of course, this is not always the case...keep in mind that it is sometimes necessary to "fire" your customers if the relationship is not positive and mutually beneficial.

[whitehatblackbox]

You wife was right, most of the time it isn't about you, even if it seems that way. I was reading about Bruce Lee a few days ago (trying to learn more about how he got his massive lats) and I came across a body building forum. Some people were saying praises, some were saying he had good genetics, and some were saying things like he was weak compared to some other body builders.

I (and I am sure you experience it too) sometimes get similar comments about me on my blog. But in Bruce Lee's case, he's no longer around to read it. Those comments, both positive and negative, were not really directed at Bruce Lee. Rather, they were the individual's reaction to Bruce Lee.

So people see you and they have a personal reaction. They may say it is about you, but it's really their response to you. It's about them and not you, so you don't have to let it affect you.

[Nathan Hale]

Good advice, everyone.  I can also be especially sensitive at home when I'm really stressed...

I agree that a large part of how they "made me feel" is totally my choice. It's tough taking that knowledge and really putting it into practice, though...I often forget that my irritation or annoyance is my choice, and not the fault of the person that "caused" the emotion.